May 2013
Sometimes you just gotta spank your own ass and be like “oooh”
sfux:
i feel like people who eat breakfast really have their lives together
Job Interview
Employer: Why do you want to work here?
Me: Because stripping is a last resort.
Me: I don't feel like getting caught with drugs.
Me: I don't feel like going to jail for getting caught with drugs.
Me: I like stuff and stuff cost money.
Me: Being broke really isn't as fun as the government makes it sound.
Me: (What I Really Say) I believe that your company is the exact establishment where I can learn to grow not only as individual, but as a team player while learning life and career lessons that I will be able to apply to multiple situations in the future.